Am I coping?

I've kidda found my self asking this question in the last few days.

I somehow still feel very overwhelmed by the arrival of little J. I'm not sure if this is down to the lack of sleep or recovering from a major operation.

There has been tears over the last few days mainly in the evenings, not one thing sets me off I just feel likes want to cry.

I won't lie it's bloody difficult removing from a c section and looking after a baby but also trying to look after a house, a husband and also getting on with life so I don't go stir crazy. I have to remember that I can't do certain things. I am a very house proud person do find the house being a mess frustrating. Maybe I need a cleaner but where do we find the money for that? we're not hard up but I don't want to be wasting money. We've managed to spend quite a bit in the last month. 

I'm still getting tummy cramps and pains, thankfully the bleeding seems to have stopped which was also getting me down. The other thing is my weight and my wardrobe. Over the last couple of years I have had weight issues it was a huge deal loosing 6.5 stone and then keeping it off. When I found out I was pregnant weight watchers went on the back burner and I went off the rails. I reckon in total I put on about 4 stone during my pregnancy. I weighted my self the day I got home and I'd lost a couple of pounds. Once all my swelling had gone down I was about a stone down but that means I'm still 3 stone up of where I would like to be. I can't wear most of my maternity trousers as there were under the bump ones that actually sit on my scar which still hurts. I need to get hubby to find time to get all my old clothes out of the loft in the hope I have some bits that fit me. But I do need to get back into a healthy eating routine I.e get back onto the weight watchers wagon but I know I'm not ready for that completely yet! I'm not ready to point again but I know that if i don't do something then my weight will creep back up and that will make me more unhappy. weight watchers says I have to wait 6 weeks after birth before I can rejoin, so I might look at the filling and heathy part of the plan to see if that might easy me back into it. Main thing is for me to stop buying all the rubbish I.e the chocolate and biscuits and ice cream easier said than done as these are all the foods that comfort me which is what I need at the moment.

The long shot is I'm kidda coping I have some good days and some bad evenings I'm thankful for the support I've had from my wonderful husband and my lovely mum but also the support I've had on twitter! I would be truly lost without them all.