2 weeks old already

Wow how time really flies once you have a little one. I can't believe little J is already 2 weeks old. 

I still stare at him in ore every day not quiet believing he's mine, almost like someone will ring the door bell any moment to collect him.

It's amazing how much life had changed at the moment it seems a constant cycle of feeding, changing, calming, sleeping and back to the beginning again. The house is full of baby things everywhere which of course is lovely.

I reminded Chris the other day of his great plans while he was off to do lots around the house. We actually had a disagreement ages ago over it as I said there was no way I wanted anything done in the 1st 2 weeks he's response was we're only having a baby the world doesn't stop! I think it may have been different if I hadn't had a c section and things may have got done but maybe thats me living in hope. Chris has been amazing the last 2 weeks not only being the great amazing father I knew he would be but also the best husband ever. Some days I feel so guilty that he does loads while I sit on the sofa with my feet up but I have to remember I am recovering from major surgery. I still have to be careful  doing the simplest things, bending down is still a no go thing but every day I feel slightly  better.

So how have I been? Well I'm still in slight pain 14 days later mostly in my lower stomach. I finished my codeine tablets during the week so am just coping with ibuprofen & paracomol only taking them when needed. I do know I need to remember to take it easy. We're trying to get out at least once a day now, which is good for me. We enjoyed a lovely family trip to Henley on Sunday and hd a picnic by the river.

Emotion wise I'm ok, I've had the odd moment but I know that's natural I do find myself getting teary over little things. As I've talked about in a previous post I was worried about postnatal depression I know it can take upto 6 weeks to appear so I will still be keeping an eye out if that's the right phrase to use.

I am worried about next week and Chris returning to work, he commented that I've mentioned it a few times. I'm not quite sure what exactly I'm worried about maybe it's a mixture of having to cope with little one all on my own or maybe it's being confined to the house or the local area as I am unable to drive for upto 6 weeks and at the moment I'm not sure I could make it to the bus stop.  I have arranged for my mum to come around so will take the week as it comes. We have been offered lots of support and help I know I just have to pick up the phone and someone would come over but I just find it hard asking for help! I even struggled slightly  with Chris but slowly I am learning, maybe it the whole feeling like a slight failure if I ask. 

One things for sure I love little J with all my heart and I wouldn't change anything.